Why do we do the things we do or believe the things we believe? Perhaps, it is because we all experience life from infinite perspectives. That is, we were all born of a different family, time, with different genes, life experiences and upbringings. What is absolutely certain to you may not be the same for the next person. We are all trying to make sense of an infinite world with a singular perspective. Could that be why our world is such a mess? Due to this complexity, we will not ever know it all, but we can continue to grow in understanding. How do we do that? As-King: As a good king would do, ask questions. Ask questions to learn something new, to inspire action, or to see how you can be of service. A wise man once said, 'You cannot be curious and judgmental at the same time.'
If we ask questions for the 'quest' of it, that is, 'in an effort to find or do something', then the question is only the first part of the equation. The second part, of course, is to listen. And there is a distinct difference between hearing and listening. You can hear noises without knowing what it is. The word listen is from the Old English hlysnan, which means, ‘pay attention to’. How many of you ask questions just to prove a point? Personally, I have been guilty on many occasions! While asking questions, sometimes it's important to first ask to assess knowledge. Again, non judgmentally. Ignorance is a condition that we all experience. If someone doesn't know something, they can be informed with another question: "Did you know, that....?" or "what if I told you....?" or perhaps even asking for permission to share something. For me, it's hard to accept when someone I love so much and want to be with is not willing to at least observe the world from my perspective. Sharing perspective doesn't mean changing who you are. Think of it like going on a vacation. If we go to the top of a mountain, we can see so much, from a different viewpoint, but we may not necessarily want to move there. Some folks are just so comfortable where they are they don't feel like, or perhaps they are not capable hiking to the top of the mountain. And that is where unconditional love and acceptance comes into play. You may want to assess the energy matrix as discussed in 71 Soluitons. Essentially, the energy matrix is a way of determining where you should invest your time, and where you should not for the purpose of maximizing your own energy & staying away from things that drain you. Listening vs hearing. - So many of my students look like they are listening, nodding the heads, smiling, sometimes even saying "yeah" or "mmm hmm," etc. But when it comes to taking action, they get hung up, because they weren't actually listening. They were hearing the words, meanwhile running other programs in their head, or thinking about what they want to say next. There is nothing wrong with them, it's merely a human condition that we need to assess and improve if we wish to establish a sense of harmony in the world. There is also a humility element of admitting when we were not listening so that someone could repeat themselves before all efforts are lost due to the lack of listening. So I encourage you, when you are in a bind or any kind, or don't understand something or someone, begin by AS-KING questions with an open heart, and an open mind, for the purpose of learning something new, and try to see things from another perspective.
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Expanded from the book, 71 Solutions - for Peace, Prosperity, and Harmony with our Planet, by Scott Allen Bunn